In 2007 I started the potentially long journey towards self-sufficiency. The garden is pretty small, so no livestock  – plus there are no real boundaries between the seven gardens in our street so I don’t think chickens nipping in and out of people’s back doors would go down very well! So, I set up a ’small’ veg patch - some people have an acre, I’ve got a 4×2.5 m rectangle. Can’t complain but it’s not exactly going to save the world’s food shortages.

Even though the soil is really workable, free-draining and fertile, after four hours of weeding, the dream of a small holding was fast becoming a nightmare.

I would like to state for the record that I now know that you don’t have to pain-stakingly remove all traces of annual weeds but I was ignorant. Something you will come to accept about me if you keep reading. As I said in my biography (if you can find it, I have no idea where it’s gone and frankly, you’re not missing much) I tend to leave the thorough research for after the event… curses.

Hey ho, I went to bed knackered and aching and just a little bit sun burnt (yes, unlike those people that actually know what they’re doing I was preparing my veg plot in early summer, that brief week before the heaven’s remained permamently open). I was feeling smart-arsed that I had turned an overgrown mess into a zen-like garden of wavy raked earth…

I awoke early on Sunday morning, kicked Frank out to work, desperately keen to get on and sort out my bamboo wigwams and plants some seeds to find the zen patch was now, in all honesty, a cat toilet. With the sun already getting warm, the smell was something else.

The proverbial bubble had been popped and I commenced a new battle with the neighbours cats. For the record (will stop doing this ‘for the record stuff’ soon) i adore all creatures great and small and especially my neighbour’s cats. One of which has, incidentally, moved in with us. I just don’t like their poo. Particularly when it’s where I want to grow something that is going to end up in my mouth.

So I am now the proud owner of some sonic cat repellers and half a ton of Silent Roar (will let you know if that works!).

Anyhow, another piping hot sunny day passed all too quickly and aside from developing a rather fetching spider’s web of strap marks, my wigwams were up, and my veg were planted. When I can remember to make a note, I’ll let you know what I planted but the main things I’ve taken away from last year’s crop were:

• Blauhilde climbing beans are delicious, productive and have a long season – definitely planting them this year. Although I do wish they would stay their glorious purple when cooked.
• Broad beans are possibly the nicest beans to grow and eat fresh – will start posting recipes when I get a chance…
• Yellow pattipans are delicious straight from the patch, cut in half and slung flesh down on the bbq and are enthusiastically productive
• Butternut squash take up loads of room (I don’t have much space) and I only got three, will pursue that squash when we move.
• I grew far too many different beans and didn’t sow my salads in fortnightly successions – i just couldn’t be bothered – will be this year!

So that’s that. What followed was a weekend love affair with my vegetables and my alarmingly large selection of cookery books as we searched for new recipes to use up the vegetables.

That pretty much brings you up to date. As you can see, I’m winging it a bit but I’m not afraid of hard work. In fact Frank was only telling me off the other day for the way I just throw myself at things (not literally, I don’t have a problem). As usual, he’s right. I’m still aching four days after dismantling a snail sanctuary masquerading as a brick raised bed. Personally I’m blaming the recent tetanus vaccination but there we go.